Hammer And Tickle: A History Of Communism Told Through Communist Jokes

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Early in the morning Brezhnev looked at the sky and smiled to the sun. Suddenly the Sun said, "Good morning, dear Leonid Ilyich." Amazed and happy, Brezhnev told the Politburo members that even the sun knew him and greeted him personally. The Politburo men were skeptical but kept their doubts for themselves. Toward the evening, Brezhnev said to them, "I see you don't trust my word. Let's go outside and I will show you!" They walked out and Brezhnev said to the sun which was already low, "My dear Sun, good evening." The Sun answered, "Go to hell, you old idiot." "What's that?" Brezhnev shouted angrily. "Do you know who you are talking with?" "I don't give a damn," the Sun said. "I'm already in the West, I do what I want!"

Soviet political anecdotes in Wikisource (in Russian) 1001 избранный советский политический анекдот The principle of the state capitalism of the period of transition to communism: the authorities pretend they are paying wages, workers pretend they are working. Alternatively, "So long as the bosses pretend to pay us, we will pretend to work." This joke persisted essentially unchanged through the 1980s. Why are the meatballs cube-shaped? ― Perestroika! (restructuring) ― Why are they undercooked? ― Uskoreniye! (acceleration) ― Why have they got a bite out of them? ― Gospriyomka! (state approval) ― Why are you telling me all this so brazenly? ― Glasnost! (openness) a b Brooks, Jeffrey (2021-04-13). Thank You, Comrade Stalin!: Soviet Public Culture from Revolution to Cold War. Princeton University Press. pp.214–215. ISBN 978-1-4008-4392-3. Meeting a foreign leader at the airport, Brezhnev begins to read his prepared speech: "Dear and much-respected Mrs Gandhi..." ..." An aide comes running to the podium and whispers, "Leonid Ilyich, it's Margaret Thatcher." Brezhnev adjusts his spectacles and starts again: "Dear and much-respected Mrs Gandhi..." The aide interrupts him again, saying, "Leonid Ilyich, it's Margaret Thatcher! Look!" "I know it's Margaret Thatcher," Brezhnev replies, "but this speech says it's Indira Gandhi!"

Jokes About Communism

Amazed, the American asks the man if his watch is from Japan. The man assures him that it is Soviet technology. Comrade Stalin, we have so many potatoes that, piled one on top of the other, they would reach all the way to God,” the farmer excitedly tells his leader. What are the new requirements for joining the Politburo? You must now be able to walk six steps without the assistance of a cane, and say three words without the assistance of paper. I want to sign up for the waiting list for a car. How long is it?" / "Precisely ten years from today." / "Morning or evening?" / "Why, what difference does it make?" / "The plumber's due in the morning."

Dora Shturman, Sergei Tiktin (1985) "Sovetskii Soiuz v zerkale politicheskogo anekdota" ("Soviet Union in the Mirror of the Political Joke"), Overseas Publications Interchange Ltd., ISBN 0-903868-62-8 (in Russian) I am from Süddeutsche Zeitung. Please clarify what is currently happening on the Strait of Kerch, if Tuzla is an isthmus or an island, and why Russians are building an embankment there. Of course they do, Granny,” her granddaughter responds. “When we reach Communism, the shops will be full – there’ll be butter, and meat, and sausage…you’ll be able to go and buy anything you want…” Why did Brezhnev go abroad, while Andropov did not? Because Brezhnev ran on batteries, but Andropov needed an outlet." (A reference to Brezhnev's pacemaker and Andropov's dialysis machine.)I am from the Washington Post. What do you say about the mass graves and the disrespect of human rights in Chechnya? At a party meeting, a Communist party officer is drilling a local worker. He asks him: “Comrade, if you had two houses, would you give one to the Communist Party?” Lubyanka (KGB headquarters) is the tallest building in Moscow. You can see Siberia from its basement."

This article uses bare URLs, which are uninformative and vulnerable to link rot. Please consider converting them to full citations to ensure the article remains verifiable and maintains a consistent citation style. Several templates and tools are available to assist in formatting, such as reFill ( documentation) and Citation bot ( documentation). ( August 2022) ( Learn how and when to remove this template message) There were also numerous politically themed Chastushki (Russian traditional songs) in Imperial Russia. We pretend to work, and they pretend to pay." (The joke hints at low productivity and subsistence-level wages within the Soviet economy.)In a prison, two inmates are comparing notes. "What did they arrest you for?" asks the first. "Was it a political or common crime?" "Of course it was political. I'm a plumber. They summoned me to the district Party committee to fix the sewage pipes. I looked and said, 'Hey, the entire system needs to be replaced.' So they gave me seven years." [12] Daniela S. Hristova , "Negotiating Reality with Anekdoty: Soviet vs. Post-Soviet Humor Lore", Russian Language Journal, vol. 58, issue 1, 2008 Jokes about Stalin usually refer to his paranoia and contempt for human life. Stalin's words are typically pronounced with a heavy Georgian accent. The TV vs the fridge: A Russian joke shows why Putin's propaganda isn't working on his own people, Business Insider One day Lenin is shaving outside his dacha with an old-fashioned razor when a small child approaches him. "Grandfather Lenin," the child begins eagerly. "Buzz off!" replies the father of the Russian revolution. What a kind man: after all, he could have cut the kid's throat.

A drunk was taking a walk in the zoo. Suddenly he saw a donkey. He elbowed his way up to the enclosure, pulled the donkey’s face up close to his own, kissed it and began to weep: “You poor bunny rabbit, what have the Communists done to you?” Alexandra Berlina (2014). Brodsky Translating Brodsky: Poetry in Self-Translation. Bloomsbury Academic. p.120. ISBN 9781623561734. Jokes about Nikita Khrushchev often relate to his attempts to reform the economy, especially to introduce maize (corn). He was even called kukuruznik ('maizeman'). Other jokes target the crop failures resulting from his mismanagement of agriculture, his innovations in urban architecture, his confrontation with the US while importing US consumer goods, his promises to build communism in 20 years, or simply his baldness and crude manners. Unlike other Soviet leaders, in jokes Khrushchev is always harmless. Brezhnev makes a speech: "Everyone in the Politburo has dementia. Comrade Pelshe doesn't recognize himself: I say 'Hello, comrade Pelshe,' and he responds 'Hello, Leonid Ilyich, but I'm not Pelshe.' Comrade Gromyko is like a child– he's taken my rubber donkey from my desk. And during comrade Grechko's funeral– by the way, why is he absent? – nobody but me invited a lady for a dance when the music started playing."Question to Radio Armenia: “Is it possible to build Communism in a random capitalist country like, say, the Netherlands?” He comments on the uncanny linguistic parallelism between the English-language "crown-crow-cow" and the Russian "korona–vorona–korova". [3] Soviet Union [ edit ]